Stalking Stevie

Stalk my ponderings, poetry and general pencil pushing.


May 2016


Criticism is my foreplay

Let me make you feel

Inadequate. Are you wet

Yet? You’re slick with

Self-doubt. Let me touch

Your every insecurity.

Let my fingernails drag

Across your regrets. Yes.

Oh yes. Do you like that?






A woman lies in bed

Lying to herself


To be okay

She will do it all

Tomorrow, she wont.


You are beautifully

broken but I know

I can fix you. I put

you back together

like a jumbled jigsaw.

The pieces slot in

easily until I am left

looking for the last

piece. Where is it?

Fifteen Part 5

“What’s wrong?” Jen frowns at Beth.

“I think I’m in trouble.” Beth replies.

“Well hurry up, I don’t have all day.” Jen pulls off her nightie and chucks it on the bed near where Beth is seated. “Gotta get to work.”

“Jen, I think I’m pregnant.”

Continue reading “Fifteen Part 5”

Good Girl

I don’t know if the way I speak is the way I actually speak or if I choose to sound this way.

That scares me.

I try to talk in the language of my ancestors but my tongue trips over itself trying to taste the words.

I don’t know if the image I project is who I really want to be or if it’s society’s version of a better me you see.

That scares me.

I paint my face with white lies and keep my hair long for you, you like it long don’t you baby?

Continue reading “Good Girl”

Fifteen Part 4

“He’s good looking for a Maori boy aye?” Jen has a coffee clasped in one hand, a cigarette in the other and last nights makeup melted down her face. Beth watches her as she watches George mowing the lawn out the window.

“Yeah I guess.” He takes off his t-shirt and rubs his face with it before draping it over his shoulder. He’s just hot. No question about it. Look at those abs! “He’s pretty nice too, came over last night to help with dinner.”

“You been crying to Kara again?”

Continue reading “Fifteen Part 4”

Fifteen Part 3

“Hey, I’m George. You’re Beth right? Aunty always talks about you lot.”

“Hey.” Beth says, “Yeah, come in”. Why am I still in my uniform? It’s so ugly. I look like a kid. How long has he ben living there, I’ve never seen him before. Beth leads him into the kitchen where Kara is boiling, frying, mixing all at once.

“Hey boy, thanks for that. You all moved in?”

“Yeah just unloaded the last box, I’ll take Dad’s Ute back to him tonight and pick up me bike.” He grins at Beth.

Continue reading “Fifteen Part 3”

Fifteen Part 2

“What’s wrong with you huh?” Beth asks Lena. Lena grizzles in response. “Okay let’s check out that nappy cause you stink kid.”

Beth takes a towel out of the cupboard and lays Lena down on it before grabbing the wipes and a nappy.

“Boys? Where are you?” She calls out as she wipes bright yellow shit from Lena’s thigh rolls. “No wonder you stank girl, this is next level. What has your mother been feeding you?” Once Lena is clean she gives Beth a big smile. “See life’s not so bad is it? Let’s go see what your brothers are up to.”

Continue reading “Fifteen Part 2”

Fifteen Part 1

Beth watches the clock from the third row, second desk from the right. Come on, I have to go. It’s now 4pm, she looks expectantly and Mrs Willis who sits at her desk doing a crossword. Beth puts her hand up.

“Miss?” she asks. Mrs Willis raises her eyebrow in Beth’s direction. “It’s time to go, Miss.”

“It’s time to go, when I say it’s time to go, Beth. Perhaps if you focused during class instead of distracting everyone you wouldn’t be in detention in the first place.”

“Sorry Miss.”

Continue reading “Fifteen Part 1”

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